I “learned” early that working alone felt safer than navigating the unpredictability of working with others.

In elementary school, my first and only team project ended with my first and only C. A straight A student until then, that C and my teacher's public criticism taught me: other people are undependable. It's better to do the work myself.

This served me academically through college, but quietly cultivated a belief that my perspective and abilities were "better." Externally I was caring and empathetic, but underneath I trusted my own judgment above others'.

In grad school, I had an epiphany. On our first day, we needed to clear 220 chairs for a reception. I was astonished at the energy and speed with which the entire group organically – and joyfully! - worked as one. That simple, breathtaking display sparked my appreciation for the power of collaboration.

Throughout my 20-year career, I increasingly championed diversity of thinking. As a certified StrengthsFinder coach, I sparked a strengths culture in my organization and trained other leaders to champion it. We helped teams experience the synergy of their talents working together—creating results impossible for anyone alone.

I wish that understanding had transferred fully to my marriage. I spent years taking advantage of my husband's agreeable nature rather than building true partnership. I didn't realize how my confidence in being "right" created emotional distance until we suffered a serious financial crisis from not being aligned.

That crisis became our turning point. My husband and I successfully partnered through the storm. I paid a deep price to truly learn: we are designed to partner with and depend on others. When we're vulnerable enough to recognize our insufficiency and confidently appreciate what we each uniquely bring, we make room for exponentially superior results.

None of us is sufficient alone – we thrive, make the best decisions, and are most productive in strong relationships.